Growing up, I never really bought into social norms.

I think that’s why I still listen to Hall & Oates. Most norms were created by insecure people with fears of ever being awesome. Our society has created these unwritten rules that are flat out wrong and impede us from true happiness. Today I will attempt to tackle one of these social norms.

Let me explain an annoyance that I have to deal with on a daily basis. I am kinda a big deal, I have to carry around a lot of stuff, a cell phone, wallet, an iPod (I have a big gig hard drive plus a case so it looks like the first version), keys, (lots of them) and Chap Stick. The thing that sucks is I only have two front pockets to fit all of these items in. I look like a tennis player with tennis balls in his pockets, and this is also very uncomfortable to say the least.

There is one simple solution to this problem — the fanny pack.

If I had a fanny pack, I could neatly organize all these things into one place. But one of these unwritten rules in our society says that it’s not “socially acceptable” to wear a fanny pack. But I ask, why? Not only would I be more comfortable, but I would no longer have to worry about someone trying to pick pocket me; everything would be securely zipped in my pack.

We as a society must evolve, like the kangaroo. The elusive kangaroo had a great dilemma – their arms were too short to carry their young. So naturally they created a pouch, a natural fanny pack. No one told them that their fanny pack was uncool or silly to have a well-designed pouch that works perfect for carrying around their kids.

I just don’t understand why wearing a bag around your hips is considered nerdy. I mean, I would even rock the pack to side of my hip so I’ll look a little cooler, kind of like someone who wears their baseball hat to side. People are walking around all day with those bluetooth things. C’mon on! You’re telling me they can play Star Trek make believe all day and I can’t wear a Fanny Pack? Could some please give me a logical reason why I can’t rock the fanny pack?